Hopeless?

If you know someone in a situation like this, prompt them, strengthen them, encourage them, help them in any way to move forward.

The dating process needs all the help and little steps it can get.

Make a difference!!

Tie them ?

In the 1st year of college?

Breaking up with an australopithecine ......

Male/Female Definitions!

VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj. female: Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another. male: Playing football without a helmet.

COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n. female: The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner. male: Scratching out a note before suddenly taking off for a weekend with the boys.

BUTT (but) n female: The body part that every item of clothing manufactured makes look bigger." male: what you slap when someone's scored a touchdown, homerun, or goal. Also good for mooning.

COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n female: A desire to get married and raise a family. male: Not trying to pick up other women while out with one's girlfriend.

ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n. female: A good movie, concert, play or book. male: Anything that can be done while drinking

FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n. female: An embarrassing by-product of digestion. male: An endless source of entertainment, self-expression and male bonding.

MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n. female: The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve. male: Call it whatever you want just as long as we end up in bed.

REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n female: A device for changing from one TV channel to another. male: A device for scanning through all 75 channels every 2&1/2 min.

THINGY (thing-ee) n. female: Any part under a car's hood. male: The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

Married to oneself?

Why is the me more prevalent than ever before?

Married to pets?

AT A SUPERMARKET, I overheard two women talking in the next aisle. "Horace and I have been together ten years now and he makes me very happy," one said. "So I don't mind buying him what he likes even if it is more expensive."
"Well, with my Benny I have no choice. He's just plain fussy," her friend replied.
I turned into their aisle. Both women were loading their shopping carts with high-quality cat food.

--Contributed to "Life In These United States"

I want to date someone else

What is dating? Hasidic/Ultra-orthodox version

Wow. The simple ultimate question!

Even some of the Ultra-Orthodox Jews are having this problem. Once upon a time and still in Hasidic circles, it began where each set of parents would meet the parents and prospective boy/girl in their home territory. So the girl's parents would come over to the boy's home and meet the parents and boy and shmooze for a while. Afterwards the parents would leave the boy alone with the girl's parents so that they can get a direct question and answer session with the boy. The same scenario would play out with the boy's parents and the girl.

If "all was well", then the real date began. The real date was where the boy's parents and the boy came over to the girl's house and everyone sat down at the table to shoomze. When the timing was correct, all parents would leave the room, leaving the boy and girl for a direct conversation time alone.

Nowadays where "looks" are more important than ever before, and the girl gets first say, the "dating" scenario is quite different. Since pictures never tell the true story, and to do it the way it was done would be considered a date, there is now a pre-date date. So for example if the girl is from Boro Park, the boy is told to be in Eihlers store on 50th and 13th Ave at a set time to technically meet the boy. What of course also happens, is that the mother and the girl are there too, so that the girl can size up the boy.

Therefore if the girl does not approve of the boy, there was never a date!

Is this pre-date dating correct? The purpose of the "old-and still current method" was to not cause any embarrassment to anyone. By going public this way, and to not call it a date, is embarrassment now allowed or not to be considered?

Isn't the purpose of dating to just to get to know the other? Isn't dating so that one should truly be able to make a educated lifetime choice?

Why has dating become a dirty word? Why has a "process" become a failure?

In order for anything we plant to grow we all know that the seed in the ground rots before it becomes a new growth. Even what we call "failures", is truly only a process. Why are we fearing fear itself?

What fear does is paralyze. Let's not continue to paralyze ourselves before we even begin life.

Parents or Friends?

When is one to trust the parents or friends? Then again, facts don't change?

Bad time for Compliments?

One of the simplest and easiest present one can give the other is a compliment.

Why is this one of the most ignored if not the most ignored "present"? Why is there a war between the sexes of who should be the first to compliment? Why is there a ego war, if one is truly claiming to look for love?

Are we looking for love or are we looking for lust and an ego lift?

Are we looking to survive and just exist, or are we looking to live?

When is the game of blame going to stop and the game of life going to begin?

Hashem help us all

Hugging is a means.....

RELATIONSHIPS

The biggest mistake is believing there is one right way to listen, to talk, to have a conversation--or a relationship.
Deborah Tannen
Communications Expert


Hugging is a means of getting two people so close together that they can't see anything wrong with each other.
Author unknown

Jokes and Puns

Is it so that women "appreciate" jokes less than men? Do women take jokes more personally than men?

If so, why do men continue to do so? Can they help themselves or not? Is it that hard or do they just not get it?

Is it the "quality" of the jokes or is this one of the major gender differences?

BBQ etiquette

After 4 long months of cold and winter, we are finally coming up to summer and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking as it's the only type of cooking a real man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved.

When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:

1) The woman buys the food.

2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.

3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.

Here comes the important part:

4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

5) The woman then goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.

6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning.

He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with the situation.

7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils,napkins, sauces and brings them to the table.

9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.

And most important of all:

10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.

11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women.

Spare time dating?

My experience as a matchmaker,especially in the jewish modern orthodox dating scene, has found that close to 85% will date in their "spare time". Their reason for marriage is to enhance the already enhanced pleasures of life.

The thought therefore follows that, that "little more" enhancement is really not that important. Therefore, spare time dating.

Insane chicks code of ethics?

Must have a pretty face?

What I find more perplexing than anything, is that it's the women who keep declaring that they must pretty!

Then again, in those circles that it is true and perpetuated, what can one say?

The great secret of successful marriage

The great secret of successful marriage is to treat all disasters as incidents and none of the incidents as disasters.

Harold Nicholson

"What gender is a computer?"

A language instructor was explaining to her class that French nouns, unlike their English counterparts, are grammatically designated as masculine or feminine.

Things like 'chalk' or 'pencil,' she described, would have a gender association although in English these words were neutral. Puzzled, one student raised his hand and asked, "What gender is a computer?"

The teacher wasn't certain which it was,and so divided the class into two groups and asked them to decide if a computer should be masculine or feminine. One group was comprised of the women in the class, and the other, of men. Both groups were asked to give four reasons for their recommendation.

The group of women concluded that computers should be referred to in masculine gender because:
1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
2. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
3. They are supposed to help you solve your problems, but half the time they ARE the problem.
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that, if you had waited a little longer, you could have had a better model.

The men, on the other hand, decided that computers should definitely be referred to in the feminine gender because:
1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic.
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories.

2 "things" men whistle at

Fate or Faith ?

What is the true reason people meet and date? What is the true reason people seem to fall in love and then fall out of it?

Are people responsible of their fate because of lack of faith?

Is the reason many almost perfect dates go bust because of lack of faith? Whether it's the lack of faith in themselves, their date or even the One Above?

IMHO opinion the answer is yes.

Are men just "pigs" or is there more to them?

Are men just "pigs" or is there more to them?

Is it about lust only or a combination of lust and love?

I have asked many women this question and am astonished how diverse the answers are. Most women answer what they were "told" vs what they truly know.

Whatever?????????

What is going on with this next generation? Is there nothing valuable left in this world except materialism?

Have we gotten so commercial'ized?

Why are parents so helpless?

His wants, Her wants

So whose wants are more important?

Looking around at different cultures, religion, professionals and the simple nature of man and women, the answer to this question will be as diverse as the 6 plus billion people on this earth are.

It reminds me of what I overheard recently one mother explaining to her friends what she is looking for her son. "I'm looking for a girl that when my son asks her to jump, she will not just answer "Yes!", she will ask "How high?".

Then again if marriage is about "We" and "Us" vs "me" and "I", this would not be a question at all.

So what are weddings?

How many people truly feel that their wedding is their funeral?

Then again, in spite of such feelings, people continue to get married.

Why?